Chapter IV: Kate

Meet Kate.

Blogger at Mindfoodly
Author of You Are Not Alone
Instagrammer at @mindfoodlyau

This is her story…

We are a husband and wife who know firsthand the devastating effects of living with an eating disorder. Together, we created Mindfoodly, a blog and online community that documents our experience recovering from an eating disorder and furthers our goal of raising awareness and, ultimately, ending eating disorders for good. 

I really don’t know what people would say about us… I (Kate) try not to think about what other people think to be honest. But if I were to guess, people would probably say that we are young and a pretty normal/conventional couple. But if you were a fly on the wall in our house, you’d know we have a pretty twisted sense of humour and an overly honest relationship. Oh, and most people probably wouldn’t suspect the mad two-person dance parties we regularly throw in our living room 😉

I guess for us the biggest battle has been my eating disorder. We’re pretty open about it and have shared most of my journey on the blog, but it’s something we work at every day and will keep working at until I reach a completely healthy, happy place.

Mindfoodly and the subsequent community that’s formed around it is definitely a highlight in both of our lives. We are so proud that we’ve been able to help and support so many others who are in similar situations to me. It’s clichéd, but seriously if we help even one person take a step away from disordered eating and towards freedom, that’s a major win (of course, we don’t want to stop there!). 

The most important relationship in our lives, first and foremost for both of us, is with God. Our relationship with, and faith in, Jesus gets us through every day – the good and the bad. He made us who we are and helps make us better each and every day. Matt and my family have also impacted hugely on the person I am. Dating Matt from such a young age (I was 16 when we got together, he was 17) has meant we’ve grown up together and developed into the people we need to be for each other. He balances me out in so many aspects of my life; I genuinely don’t know what I would do without him.

I still don’t think there are any limits in my life. My dreams now I guess are pretty boring by most standards; I dream of a future family with Matt and that we’d live happy, healthy lives, surrounded by people we love. Family is everything. It doesn’t have to be by blood, but I believe everyone needs a family

I don’t think if you’d told me when I was 12 that I would be married, recovering from an eating disorder and blogging publicly about it at the age of 25 that I would have believed you. So, I’m living a very different life to the one I imagined!

My loves and passions are God, my family, friends, cooking and moving in a healthy way. My biggest fear is failure; I’m a perfectionist and failure has never sat well with me. It’s something that I am working on, but is still a definite struggle.

Because I’m a perfectionist, being disciplined is something I’ve always been great at. Regardless of what it is – food, exercise, study, whatever – if I set a goal in my head I’ve always had the discipline to complete it. This is my best quality and my worst all at the same time. I’m a person to go to if you need to get a job done, but sometimes getting a job done becomes all encompassing (eg. being “more healthy” became an eating disorder… not a great result). I’m working on being more balanced and learning to give up control when I need to.

I would love to be remembered as someone who loved and cared for those nearest to her. Someone who could be depended on, and someone who you could be open with. I think that it’s important that everyone knows it’s ok to not be ok.

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